Mitt Romney is an idiot

Newman wasn't kidding when he said
"When you control the mail (communication) you control....information!

He's actually a very smart man, but it's a terrible thing when people use their brilliant brains for stupid things. When they get caught doing bad things and then they try to backtrack and make up MORE lies for their own egotistical purposes.

I had a guy in my life - actually a few - that did that very thing. Lies upon lies upon lies. If you think, for one MINUTE, that that shit is gonna fly with me?

You have quite obviously underestimated EVERY.THING. ABOUT. ME.

And I don't have to tell these people who they are. Women underestimate me and men do. It's a full-fledged frontal attack from all sides. Democrats, Republicans, Tea-Baggers, the like. Doesn't matter. If you've got blonde hair, blue eyes, and a somewhat high voice?

Well OBVIs you're stoopid.

So, not that long ago, Mitt Romney was quoted about the "other" 98%. You know, the rest of us poor schlubs who should shine his shoes and do something with his pathetic hairdo from 1970. Wake up, Mitt!

And, really? What kinda name is that anyway? Your parents obviously hated you cos they named you after a baseball glove.

Mitt.

Right.

Now Mr. Mitt has flip-flopped his whole deal and is talking about "helping" the poor?

Oh, wait. You wanna run for Prez AGAIN and now suddenly you're "for" the people instead of speaking with disdain about "the other 98%."

Riight.

That's just very handy.

Very slick.

NOT.

You are a transparent fool who thinks you're SMARTER than the other 98% and you, sir, are DECIDEDLY full of proverbial shit.

Ugh with these stupid boys with their small, shrunken "members" that think they're smarter than anyone else in the room.

Like that fool asshole in Alabama promoting the new abortion law that would require women to get "permission" from the "father" because fetuses have more rights than the actual woman who is carrying that shit.

WTF?

It's a real thing. This guy ACTUALLY believes that the fetus is more alive and has more rights than the person in whose uterus it is.

Is is.

Be.

WHAT THE HELL?

Or H eee double hockey sticks as my parents would say when I was a kid (like I couldn't spell!!). My IQ is higher than my Mom's or Dad's (sorreee!!).

In any case, to H eee double hockey sticks with these raging jerks who don't think we're paying attention.

Take your small d*ck and suckit. And leave me the f*ck alone because your advances are uncalled for, unattractive and revolting.

Learn SUM WerDs. And punctataions and read a goddamn book and GROW the f*ck up.

(By the by, the misspellings and bad grammars are ON PURPOSE. It's called Irony. Satire. Learn about it.)

I'm smarter than you, I tread lightly, but I carry a VERY, VERY large and scary stick.

It's called higher learnin'

It's a type of StraTEEgeory, there, Bushie and Cheney and all of you stupid assholes who won't listen to science and "the other 98%."

Can you please pluralize tomatoes or potatoes? Oh, right. You couldn't even manage that at a National Spelling Bee.

Good heavens. And we vote for these cretins? Just Wow. Wow wow wow wow wow.

I believe I will be asking for advice from my dog. He just turned one and has the good sense to respect my boundaries and behave civilly. More than I can say for some people.

Jesus would NOT be pleezed. Nor would the other 8000 Gods that exist in every other place in the world.

Travel. Learn something. Google that shit. Stop stealing from others and just CARRY the F*CK On with being NICE.

Again?

Taken a couple months ago.
The foothills of the Chugiach Mountains, Campbell Tract. 

For Pete's sake.

Honestly?

I'm on my OWN Facebook page and decide I want to write something that was funny to me. Ironic. The Epitome of Hyperbole (as stolen from Brian Regan, the best comic out there right now).

By the way, if you need a laugh or to cheer up someone, make them sit down for an hour with you and watch Brian Regan (anything), Jim Gaffigan (again, anything) or even Dane Cook or Stephen Wright or Jimmy Fallon or Seth Meyers.

I watched a comedy roast last night (for James Franco BY James Franco!) with Seth Rogan, Jonah Hill, Sarah Silverman, James Franco, and more...

Absolutely stunningly one of the funniest things I've seen in a long time.

However, I didn't write anything nasty to someone for their own humorist slant. It was a ROAST. Irony. Satire. Jeez. Supposed to be nasty! On purpose-like.

So, cretin face, don't go on someone else's page or blog or whatever and slam them. Don't do it.

Ain't nobody asking you to come here and read stuff and then be a jerk about my opinion on MY blog or MY page.

Heard of the 1st Amendment? That thing called Free Speech. Yes. It's a thing.

If you don't agree, then just move along. It's called free speech and net neutrality (or what we have left of it right now with the ridiculous hacking and stupidity).

It tends to be boyz who think they know "better" than I do and if you don't KNOW me and don't know that I'm sarcastic and enjoy a fine turn of the ironic phrase or pun, then F*CK off.

Really. Just f*ck off. 

Who the hell are you to try to edit MY page or my thoughts or opinions? Huh?

There's a great saying that "Opinions are like assholes. Everybody's got one and think the other ones stink."

So, this jerk face got stinky with me AGAIN because I deleted his nasty comment from MY page. IT's MYYYYYY page. Mine. Not yours. Yes, I get to edit that shit and I'm prolly gonna "unfriend" you, too.

I don't need you telling me about Hyperbole. I invented that shit.

Looks to me like somebody learned a new wooord! Looks like somebody thinks he's smarter than anyone else.

Nope.

Gonna have to do a hell of a lot more than that to quash my own thoughts and ideas.

MOtherf*cker.

(And, frankly, I bet your own Mom thinks you're an asshole, too!)

I'm so sick of assholes right now I can barely even leave the house.

God, I miss my people.

ew

Dinner parties and the ocean

Detail on a recent arrangement I did for a charity event here in Anchorage.
Because I obviously have no effing brain and design stuff when I'm not learning more about Theoretical Physics.
Reverse sexism. It's a sucky thing and we ladies need to be nicer to each other.
Don't assume that because I'm a cook and have a clean, pretty house that I'm dumb.
It's asshole-ish, pretentious and stupid. And, frankly, I don't want you here if you don't respect me.

So last night, I had a couple of young friends over. They pretty much are fetuses compared to my aged person.  They are young, open, smart, interesting and interested kids - about 22 years old.

Do you remember 22?

Oy.

I was fresh out of college, world at my feet and I believed I knew just about everything a person could want to know.

HA!

I had spent the summer in Europe in between my sophomore and junior year in college. I got a scholarship to do so with a company that helped place kids like me into colleges in France for an international exchange program.

Well, I spent the summer in Caen, France up in Normandy near the English Channel (La Manche). I spent the summer speaking French to the French kids and they practiced their English on us American kiddos.

There were a wide range of kids from all over the United States that took part in this cultural/language immersion program. I loved every single minute of it. I had my very own dorm room (I didn't even have to share) and I drank fancy French Evian spring water with loads of weird minerals and it tasted bad, but I drank it anyway because hello? French. Sophisticated. Cool.

I wore the clothes that French people wore and ate the food and drank the water because I wanted SO desperately to be like those French ladies who were skinny and SO amazing and SO cool and they didn't wear makeup because they didn't care what ANYONE thought of them. Amazing. I was mesmerized by the French women.

The French men? A buncha dogs. Just like the Italian men and the Swiss and American men and all the others that were always on my ass. I was hot and young and American and because of that, they thought I was dumb.

It's a strange thing to be underestimated because of the way you look. You have to play catch-up with people.

So, just last night, this young woman who was here kinda dissed me. She's in an engineering program here in Alaska at a local University. She's struggling with some of her classes and has to take some even harder ones to graduate.

I offered to tutor her for free. But she politely declined by saying "Well, these are really advanced classes. I don't think you could help!"

Imagine that shit?

Here I am, more than twice her age. A published scientific author with 30+ years of advanced experience in biology and propagation and conservation work and this twit thinks I can't help her with a f*cking Physics 101 course.

Riiiiiiggght.

"Ohhh, let me bow down to you, you 22 year old dufus! You definitely know WAAAY more than I do. "

"Please do tell me about this difficult thing you are doing called Calculus."

( I had to take 2 years of advanced Calculus to get my degree. Magna Cum Laude. Phi Beta Kappa. Shut your face.)

So I gave her my recent copy of a text by Michio Kaku. Only one of the world's most leading authorities on advanced Theoretical Physics.

You wanna dis me? Let me school you, sweetheart.

For F*CK's sake. Give me a break. As IF?

So, reverse sexism is alive and well and living here, in Anchorage, AK.

Shit.